Drugs For Dummies


I returned from Calgary with an appreciation for the kindness of Canadians and a hacking cough.  I handled the cough like any other health issue; ignore and it will probably eventually go away.  This is combined with copious amounts of over the counter drugs.  Unfortunately, my old standby failed me.  The cough continued through this week and even got worse.  So, I decided I would break down and see a doctor.

Good they can see me today at 10:45.  I get there at 10:30 and see the PA at 11:45.  WTF!  But that is a different story.  I tell them what ails me.  They write a prescription and send it to the pharmacy and I pick it on the way home.  I get home and decide that this time I going to read how many pills to take and when before taking them.

And now for the reason for this post.  It says take three pills a day BY MOUTH.  Really?  By mouth?  Has this been an issue?  Before they specified “by mouth” were some people taking a pill and shoving it up their nose?  Or some other orifice?  Were some people dropping a pill into their palm and then stood stumped.  Did they scratch their heads and say, “Now what?”.

Or is “by mouth” not the norm anymore?  Are the options only limited by the number of orifices, with each have equal weight in being the winner.  

By mouth!  Is this caption in response to some lawsuit brought by a mother in some trailer park who took her kid to the doctor.  Got a prescription and subsequently shoved two pills up each nostril while holding her hand over the kid’s mouth, urging him to snort the pills.  Kid brain dead.  Mother sues the pharmacy for not guiding her properly.  After all, she tried the same delivery method as the drugs that she took.

Really, by mouth?  One day ET is going to land on our planet, rummage through our medicine cabinet and leave after deciding that there was no intelligent life here.

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